Being a mother is the greatest gift I've been blessed with. It's who I've been for almost a decade of my life now. There's so much beauty in being a mother but there's also a side to motherhood that most women do not talk about...the day to day challenges that we're all faced with.
For a while, I felt as though I was the only one struggling with motherhood. While most moms I know were sharing picture perfect moments I was struggling to transition from a mom of one to two. Perhaps it was because I'm a perfectionist. I wanted to be the perfect mother. The one that has a clean and organized home at all times, the one that makes all her meals from scratch, and the one that feels and looks put together while juggling one hundred tasks at once. Does that even exist?
All the pressure I was putting on myself led me to BURNOUT. What do you do when you feel that things are spiraling downwards? I pulled myself together, which is easier said than done, because there was no way I was going to dwell on what I considered a failure so I challenged myself to change my mindset and my methods.
Be honest with yourself
Only you know when you're running low on fuel and beginning to feel burnt. Burnouts look different for everyone so set your boundaries according to how you feel and how much you can handle. Take control of it before it takes control of you. Accepting that you're struggling doesn't make you any less of a mother. In fact, it empowers you to be and do better.
Give yourself ME moments
It's only natural for mothers to put their children first but when one thing leads to another and we find ourselves at the bottom of our priority list, or completely off it, it's likely to affect the entire family. When your a mom, moments to yourself are golden. For me, it's just dedicating fifteen minutes to mediate in the mornings or going outdoors for a walk after work to unwind and recharge to be mentally capable of taking on the remainder of the day.
Make a list and share it
Naturally, I'm organized and run on lists. Everything I want or need to do, goes on some type of list. For tasks having to do with the family or house, I share it with my husband and daughter and they take on whatever they can help with saving me time and energy.
Set daily goals
There's a lot we want to do but in order to accomplish our goals, without feeling burnt, it's best to break them down into small tasks. This prevents us from feeling overwhelmed while making a little progress each time we work on it and ultimately scratch it off our list. Aside from my daily responsibilities I pin point one to three things I want to do that don't necessarily fall into my routine. I see simple and small tasks as stepping stones that keep me pumped along the way and when mom feels good, the whole family can feel it and see it.
Embrace the Chaos
Each day doesn't always go according to how we plan it. Just like motherhood, there's a beauty behind those moments in life too. Sometimes I have to remember to BREATHE and all of a sudden cracker crumbs, t-shirt stains, and toys scattered throughout the house are no longer so bothersome. Remember this: This phase in your life is temporary. The lists will get checked off. The messes will be cleaned up. Do what you can when you can. Enjoy the present.
My motherhood is perfectly imperfect. I'm doing the best that I can raising little humans. I know that you are too. Let's enjoy the journey and support one another along the way. Put yourself on time out every now and then because you deserve those moments to yourself and your kids deserve a happy and healthy mom. The more water you pour over yourself, the more you are able to pour over your garden of little ones.